Time kills when you have a life-threatening decision to make. Darkness. A small box room. A door. That’s all it is really. It’s definitely enough to make one tremble with worry and fear. Fear that fate is up to whatever is behind the door. And you know you’re going to have to open it. Ones in the upper class of this modern society would question why we- outcasts- are sweating, full of anxiety. They just don’t get it though do they?
Just take it slow. We have no other choice in the end. Because they win… they always win. It’s ironic how we’re being forced in. I guess I get used to being forced out of things. Places. Gently turning the knob. 14 years of life will be wasted yet the memories will always haunt us. The trauma will always be beyond us. And what’s behind us? Absolutely nothing because we will always be behind everything and everyone. We will never get ahead in life. This is it.
I see them. They just came out of the mall. Happy, full of joy… My family. But where was I? I must’ve been about the age of 7. They aimlessly wandered about the immense greenery around them, like there was not a single care in this world that they had to worry about. I remember this moment. We were talking about our ambitions for the future. They laugh, soaking up the sun. Then they saw me. Overboard with glee, they came closer. I miss them. My eyes are full of water. Am I home again? A tear rolled down my cheek. My vision blurred. Then I blinked and…
Dammit.
As time passes, as time kills, your delusions become stronger. You become weaker. If only we could just live in our fantasies…
I stood there, blankly. A bombed city, full of ruins. My life will never be the same will it? It’s done. Over. God has no other plans for me does he. So I stand there, in denial, as I let time kill me.