Age 3: Why were her clothes pink and tight?
She liked blue
Mum said “Dresses are for pretty girls”
She wanted to play with cars
Girls play with dolls
Age 4: A boy was pulling her hair
“You should play house with your friends”
“Why is he mean to me?” she asks
“He’s mean to you because he likes you”
Did being liked always hurt?
Age 6: “I need some strong boys to lift these tables.” the teacher said
She could lift them easily
But she was ‘just a girl’
Age 10: The boys got called on more in maths
She was expected to be good at:
- baking
- dressing up
She liked maths more
Age 12: She had her first kiss
She didn’t like the boy
She wanted to get her hair cut
Mum said “Long hair is for pretty girls.”
Age 16: She had her first ‘real’ date
It wasn’t real
“You’re so pretty.” he said
Not even trying to disguise the fact that he wasn’t looking at her face
Age 16: She was used for her body
“Did you hit?”, “Was she good?”, “Nice one bro.”
She was told her shoulders and stomach distracted the boys
She hated her body
She didn’t like how she looked
The mask she wore came off throughout the day
Age 16: She cried, a lot
Why did being ‘liked’ hurt?
Age 18: She had her first drink
Age 18: She got harassed for the 6th time… that day
“You were asking for it, wearing that.”
Why did showing some skin give men the right to say and do what they wanted?
Age 20: She left her drink uncovered in a bar
A man took her to his home
A man used her when she said no
Age 20: She cried even more
Went to therapy
Learned how to live in a body that no longer felt like her own
Age 22: She had a boyfriend
He was nice
England lost a match
He wasn’t so nice
He begged
He “loved her”
“It was just frustration.”
He would “never do it again”
Would being loved always hurt?
Age 23: He hit her again
And again…
Age 23 and a half: She finally left him
Age 25: She met a guy who was ‘the one’
She was told her life should be marriage and kids
She wanted that one day
She wanted a career more
Age 28: She fell pregnant
The miracle of life
She lost that baby
Never allowed to grieve
Age 29: She finally had a baby girl
She was healthy
She wouldn’t put her in pink, tight clothes
Age 30: She was asked “Would you rather be stuck in the woods with a bear or a man?”
“A bear,” she said instantly “because I wouldn’t be ‘asking for it’ if a bear hurt me.”